Forgiveness, Letting Go

A well-known religious leader has said: "He who takes offense when no offense is intended is a fool, and he who takes offense when offense is intended is a greater fool."

I have been pondering on the benefits of forgiving others, and of letting go of past hurts. I have had little bits and pieces of news about loved ones and things that have gone on between them. These have given me a chance to evaluate the real usefulness of being angry, hurt, and hanging on to the emotional baggage from things that happened a long time ago. I have lots of experience at having my feelings hurt, just like anyone.

So, let's say someone does something really mean or low to me. Suppose it's a family member, a person I will run into at family functions forever. What do I do? Do I stop visiting family because I may encounter this relative? Do I end all family relationships because someone (intentionally or unintentionally) hurt my feelings? I am not sure this is the answer to having a peaceful, fulfilling, and happy life, which is what I am after.

One of the sisters who taught me in Catholic school said, "Very few people care enough about you to really hurt your feelings." And, in all honesty, she's right. Who are the people that care about me? This (fictitious) family member who was careless with her words didn't really know what she was talking about; she didn't know the facts about what was going on with me. And the people who aren't close to me don't have a clue about me or the things that may hurt me anyway. So....

"Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself." In my experience, letting go of the hurt is being good to myself. It is a form of self-nurturing and a way of taking back my own personal power. If I stay away from activities and people that are good for me because I may have to deal with someone that's been mean to me, who wins? Not me, that's for sure. And, at this Christmas season, it's nice to be able to focus better on the richness of the season by being free of the heaviness and heartache of hard feelings held close.

So, here is my wish to all of you (my 3 dear followers and whoever else lands on this page) that you have a happy, heartwarming, and joyous holiday